Posted by Jon, onehumanbeing on June 4, 2009
It may seem like I’ve disappeared, but I’m still here… weathering a long storm of depression.
This storm started back in late April, and has come and gone in waves, in cycles within cycles.
I should be use to this by now, but I never get used to it, always hoping that the blue sky days will last, but knowing there’s always another storm coming.
The spring storms are very unpredictable.
Some years it’s like a rushing, fresh breeze of creativity and new activities. Other years it comes like a cruel north wind, and I find myself tied to the mast just to make it to the early summer break when my next big shift comes.
I’ll be 45 in two weeks, on the 18th.
I’ve had depressions and manias since I was a child (something I’ve come to understand over the last few years), and actively dealing with my mood-swings for the last eleven years.
After all this time I’ve become somewhat familiar with the cycles and seasons of my inner landscape, and the strange weather patterns of storms that ravage and shape that landscape.
But that doesn’t make it any more pleasant at Depression Ground Zero, on my daily attempt at making something out of the dreams and visions in my head.
So for days I hide out on the sofa, watching shows on the History Channel about UFOs and Ancient Civilizations, reading news stories on my laptop from the Huffington Post, and sleeping, lots of sleeping…
When I have energy I volunteer at a Medical Marijuana collective here in Long Beach called AAC – Apothecary’s Assistants Collective and take photos for a project of mine called The MMJ Project (MMJ is short for Medical Marijuana).
I’m glad for my project and volunteer work because it gets me out of the apartment, and around people.
Of course, there’s more to it than that… but left to my own devices to avoid the pain of depression I will disappear into a world of deep thoughts, MMJ, meditations and TV and ignore the rest of the world.
So, getting me outside of myself is a good thing – especially during these storms.
There’s my update from this last month or so…
Hopefully I’ll reach more peaceful weather soon and be able to write about some interesting visions I’ve had during these storms (the visions are the only rewards sometimes for traveling through these storms) and the stories that have been weaving their way through my daily existence.
Until later, best of health,
Jon, onehumanbeing
Posted by Jon, onehumanbeing on April 29, 2009
Note: the project known as The Medical Marijuana Lists is now using a shortened version of the name – The MMJ Lists
Catching Up…
Vader Kush from AAC
I’ve been dusting off the files, photos and various materials of The MMJ Lists to move it closer to how I envision it…
Since January I’ve been taking photos at A Soothing Remedy Collective and more recently, AAC – Apothecary’s Assistants Collective, where I also volunteer as a bud-tender, front desk clerk, joint roller, or whatever else is needed while I’m there for my shift.
Monday (April 27th) I was there for the afternoon and evening shifts… and spent most of the evening rolling joints of White Widow to give away to the members.
AAC gives you a free joint every time you stop by to get your herb… it’s part of the “member-focused” approach to the Medical Marijuana dispensary movement and an effort to slow down the collective-hopping (see below) that goes on.
(read more here…)
Also… I’ve added to the “About” page…
About The MMJ Lists
In June of 2008 I started taking photos and posting menus on WeedTracker.com for a local, Long Beach collective called CCLB, Canna Collective Long Beach.
The whole thing started as a fluke – I just wanted CCLB to keep up with their menu posting because gas prices were soaring and online people wanted to know what was available before they made the long drive – sometimes coming all the way from San Diego – a nearly 300 mile round trip.
My round trip to CCLB was only 10 miles, so during June I started my volunteer gig as the Menu Guy for CCLB. Over the July 4th weekend, through a series of events I’ve written about elsewhere, I officially became an unpaid, community volunteer at CCLB and through October of that year I photographed nearly 80 different strains, some of them several times.
It was almost an overwhelming situation, and it started to seem like I spent all of my time photographing, preparing the photos, posting them and then posting the menu… and by the beginning of November I had to halt the project as it was going, and think about how to present the photographs. (The price of gas had fallen too, so my original reason for posting menus had ended.)
(read more here…)
The link to The MMJ Project is: http://mmj.onehumanbeing.com/
Posted by Jon, onehumanbeing on April 13, 2009
Spending Time At The Collective…
Today was my first day behind the counter at AAC – Apothecary’s Assistants Collective – as a volunteer staff member. Before I left home this morning I made a bunch of buttons to bring in with me.
That’s me in the little movie pressing the buttons with my button machine. Tania took the photos and suggested the little movie – nice idea 
You can click on the moving image to see a larger version…
I’ll be volunteering there several times a week and learning about how a Collective works, from a budtender’s view (note: a “Budtender” is the person who hands the herb and helps members select their medicine) – a different way of seeing my project, and it has already given me some things to think about for The MMJ Project.
You can follow my project about medical marijuana at The MMJ Project – my ongoing art project about this moment in time and the unique world of medical marijuana in Southern California.
As a user of marijuana for 26 years, and a long time legal patient under Prop 215, I’ve become a solid believer in the use of marijuana as a legitimate medicine.
I have an acquaintance through the collective who is a terminally ill patient. She is still alive 4 years longer than her doctor gave her because of the herb – just one of many stories of health and wellness I’ve heard over the years.
Medical Marijuana Is No Laughing Matter
People giggle about marijuana, but for us patients that have found a safe and easy solution to some of our health issues this is no laughing matter…
Unfortunately for us we have to wait for our political leaders to grow-up and stop treating this with a snicker and wink…
And while they giggle more people get put through the legal grinder for making choices that don’t concern anyone but that person and their doctor.
There seems to be something very immoral and irresponsible for leaders like Obama to make a joke about other’s health concerns. I’m still saddened by Obama’s response and I’m starting to view his agenda with suspicion… just another politician.
Meanwhile… back to the Collective
I took a bunch of photos of AAC while I was there today, and I’ll post those over on The MMJ Project later on.
Have a great week, and remember; 420 - The International Marijuana Day - is next Monday – April 20, 2009!
Posted by Jon, onehumanbeing on February 23, 2009
How about some real justice? Now that would be a nice change...
Tania and I went to the rally at the Federal Court Building in downtown Los Angeles for Charles C. Lynch and for the cause of Medical Marijuana this afternoon.
I had emailed Charles to let him know we going to be there and bringing buttons to give away. The official name for the rally was “Hope for Change” – but I finished hoping on Nov. 5th – Now I’m standing up, as are many others, so we get real change that helps us as patients.
I think our fear and silence has let this nonsense go on for too long. It’s true that some of us will take a hit for standing up, but we’ll all lose if no one stands up. I really believe in medical marijuana, I really believe that marijuana is a gift from God.
I also feel like I have nothing more to say that can add to the debate over marijuana use. Over the last 26 years I’ve heard just about every argument on both sides, and frankly, I’m just tired of it… The truth has been said over and over and ignorance still rules the day.
Photos from the rally
Here’s some photos that Tania took today at the rally…
Read more about the rally
Today’s Rally: The injustice is that Charles C. Lynch, a good community business man, is having to go through this whole stupid trial and everything else just because he choose to be compassionate, stepped forward and helped provided relief for numerous MMJ patients in his area.
But the local sheriff who does not like marijuana being legal for people with chronic illnesses, and apparently believes his opinion matters more than the law and the state constitution he’s sworn to uphold, so he called the DEA in to try and ruin this man’s life…
Here’s a bit from the MPP’s newsletter about Charles’ case:
Charles Lynch operated a medical marijuana dispensing collective in Morro Bay, Central Coast Compassionate Caregivers, that helped more than 2,000 seriously ill patients obtain their medicine in a legal, clean, and safe environment. In March 2007, the facility was raided, and federal Drug Enforcement Administration (DEA) agents later arrested and charged Charles with five counts of marijuana-related federal crimes.
Charles not only complied with California’s long-standing medical marijuana laws, he was operating under a license issued by the City of Morro Bay and was a well-respected member of the local community. Nevertheless, Charles was treated like a common criminal under draconian federal marijuana laws, and the county sheriff even cooperated with the subversion of state law.
The jury in Charles’ trial was not allowed to hear any information relating to medical marijuana and his compliance with state law. Consequently, on August 5, 2008, Charles was found guilty on all counts.
While President Obama has pledged to end the raids on state-legal medical marijuana providers, that does little to help Charles. He is one several providers still facing federal charges or sentencing from raids during the Bush administration. His sentencing is set for March 23, and if the judge doesn’t show discretion because of Charles’ status under state law he could end up spending the rest of his life in prison.
I made a bunch of buttons over the weekend for the rally that look like this…
I quickly gave away all 120-150 buttons and got to walk around, talk to a few folks… I haven’t been feeling so great (the flu – almost over it now…) so we cut out after a bit. I just wanted everyone to have a souvenir of a moment, a moment when we know we stood for this movement, we stood for Charles, stood for justice, we stood for change…
For those that got a button today – Wear it proudly, proud that you stood up, proud that you’re part of the change, and not just talking about it…and I hope it brings a smile to your face when you a digging through a box of old stuff 20 years from now and find this little button and you remember those crazy days back when marijuana was illegal…
A movement isn’t just a one day event, but a series of steps to reach a goal.
Help Charles C. Lynch reach the goal of staying out of prison and getting back to his life.
Visit his website: (http://www.friendsofccl.com/) and send him a message of support today. On his site are listed a number of ways you can help. On March 23rd he gets sentenced…
Posted by Jon, onehumanbeing on February 16, 2009
Double Rainbow Detail: Click to see Image of the Moment
Please note: I am publishing this post about a week [2-25-2009] after I first wrote it. See the note at the end of the post for more details…
Ripples After The Splash
The last 36 hours have been very difficult. (the story gets better, really…)
I’ve experienced this before, the relapse after a big depression, just as you’re heading out of the whirlpool. It’s like ripples from a big splash in a pond.
Peeved
That’s the word I settled on to describe how I feel today. I’m angry, bothered and vexed – but mostly it’s wrestling with God, trying to get through my confusion of the moment…
So today, I’m not the best to be around – I have a short temper, and I feel like I have an agenda in every conversation… most of which have been with Tania who had the day off today and got to enjoy my dark windstorms and blowing clouds…
I don’t get this way very often, and haven’t in a long time, so it’s really throwing me around this time, and tripping up my footing.
WAIT! There is more to read… read on »
